Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Spiritual Month III: Pick & Choose


 
PICK & CHOOSE

by

Anthonystjoseph


     I am amazed sometimes at how the Universe and its spiritual guides work…  I am dumbfounded, struck, and stuck in awe sometimes at the seemingly all encompassing spiritual matrix that we live in, or at least that I live in because the reality of life is that I can never be sure what world YOU live in.  I can only try to conceive the world that I am living in.  This evening I was directed by certain events to read Job 38 in the Bible and was shocked silly and stunned stupid with the fact that this Job 38 was apparently God talking directly to me.

     You see, I tend to have regular arguments with God as to how he is handling things down here on this planet called Earth, or more to the point, how He is NOT handling things down here on Earth.  Sometimes, to me, it seems that God is on a serious vacation or has just adopted a serious lack of empathy for our situation.  I have got to tell you again, since I have told him more than a million times, I really have some serious problems with the way he’s handling some of this mess we’re in.  God’s suppose to be omnipotent, right, all powerful, right, all knowing, right,…  Well GET ON IT!  We’re DROWNING HERE!

      So, you get the point, basically, it’s back and forth with me and God…  So I, like Job, who is the most famous pawn in mankind’s history, am faced with the struggle of events I am dealt.  And I’ve said it before but I’ll say it again, God generally wins these arguments or he leaves the room…  It’s always the last word with him.  I’m usually screaming when he leaves, “GET BACK HERE!”  Hey, we go way back, God and I, he knows me; and I know HIM.

     Well, you know God rarely talks.  God is a man of few words; you know he’s the old ‘I AM’ sort of guy…  Well at least I thought he was a man of few words. 

      So after I get the huge hint from above this morning to go check out this certain Job Scripture I start to read Job 38 and I am shocked that God is finally talking!  I haven’t read every single part of the Bible nor have I read a lot of the Bible.  I tend to believe that God is in your heart and if there is only ONE BOOK that you can find God in then there is going to be a lot of the world left out and I just don’t think MY God is like that so I don’t think a ‘single’ BOOK is the way to GOD!  But there are some parts of the Bible and a lot of ‘other’ Holy Books that I really get off on.  So the truth is, I like to ‘pick and choose’ the stuff that rings true to MY heart.

     I happen to understand and comprehend the fact that most of the Bible was written by man and man alone.  I feel if you do want to feel the true God of whatever than you need to let it speak to your heart of truth.  I feel listening to the heart of good and the heart of truth will take you to God.  Again, for this reason, I haven’t read the whole Bible although I know most of the stories from church and Catholic School.  In my opinion, some of those fools in the Bible need to be put in check.  People like Leviticus really need to be put in check; when that guy is done throwing rocks at people there’s nobody left alive and standing but HIM, and I think he might even catch a rock or two. 

     I have always told this joke about how when I get to Heaven I put up my fists and say, “Okay, WHERE’S LEVITICUS!  Me and him about to go some rounds.”  The angels look at me funny and then they all laugh and say, “You didn’t think HE was here, did you?”

     So I start to read Job 38 and apparently Job has lodged a lot of the same complaints at God that I have. You know the ones, why this, why that, why this, why THAT…  It’s a very long list I and Job have for God as in, ‘what were you thinking?’  Well I pick up in Job 38 that God has heard OUR complaints and he is truly pissed off and having a real life celestial temper tantrum. 

     He starts off with, “Who is this who darkens counsel by words without knowledge.”  Oh my, did you hear what God just said with THOSE words, he’s GOOD at it I’ll tell you THAT!  He basically just said, who is this numb skull talking out of the side of his ASS!?  I was like, ‘no he didn’t’… He was like, “YES I DID!”  You know he’s loud.  Then he went on to tell me and Job, “Prepare thyself like a man”, like he was getting ready to beat me down and calling me a punk.  I AM a man!  Told me things like, “…he’ll question me and I’ll answer”, “…shut up”, and so on…  Then he went on a tirade and told me “Where were you when I laid the foundations of the Earth?”  Did I measure the Earth?  Asking me things like “DID I fasten the foundations, DID I lay its cornerstone, DID I shut the sea in with doors, did I, did I, did I,…”  Geez, calm down dude, we’re giving you credit for all that, but what have you done for us lately?

     Then the Lord goes on to tell Job and I, he’s losing his breath he’s so angry and I can tell, so he pauses and says,  And here your proud waves must STOP!  Oh goody gum drops, I don’t really take too kindly to people telling me what to do so you know this is not going to work, telling me to STOP.  I don’t really let anyone tell me what to do ever… There was that redneck in Gettysburg, Pennsylvania, who made me tinkle on myself a little but that’s a whole different story.  I didn’t know him like I know God.

     Although I am sure my proud waves will continue, I am going to read Job from beginning to end because I believe that Job and I are going to live on the same block in Heaven and hang out at the same clubs, because we both agree.  We are both proud men… 

     I guess I should just be thankful for all the laughs that God provides us with.  I think God is a comedian at heart.  I can see God on Judgment day when it’s my turn saying, “Oh goody gum drops, I have been waiting for this.  EVERYBODY SILENT!  It’s Mister Pick and Choose.  Hi Mister ‘Pick and Choose’.  I’m about to show you some ‘Pick and Choose’ alright.  I CHOOSE not to PICK YA!  Ha-ha that Mister Funny Man!  Yeah, God got jokes.

By Anthonystjoseph

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“I’m a philosopher.  I’m not an evangelist… to say, ‘God did it,’ and then just leave it at that?  That’s to abandon the search before it’s even begun.”~ ’The River Why’

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