Rocky Becomes A Healer

 

ROCKY BECOMES A HEALER

by

Anthonystjoseph

Rocky and his owner are walking through the park.

“Hey man, you have got to cheer up.”

“I can’t Rocky, I just miss Linda so much.”

“Hey man, face it, she left you!  You find one piece of trim, you find another.  Rocky’s rules.”

“It’s not the same in the human world like it is in your dog world Rocky.”

“Man up!  We’re all dogs.  The sooner you learn that, the better off you’ll be.”

“I’m not made like you Rocky.  I can’t just hit it and quit it all the time.  I want to get married.”

“Oh geez.  You’re killing me man.  You’re killing me.”

“Rocky, I want to get married, don’t you understand!  I need a woman, ONE woman.”

“Wuss!  GIRL!  POODLE!”

“Shut up Rocky, you don’t know anything.  You’re just happy ‘Lovely’ is gone.”

“Actually, Rocky isn’t happy about that at all.  Our pal ‘Lovely’ actually had a good effect on Rocky getting extra trim.  All the lady dogs thought I was a great guy protecting him against Red that day in the dog park.  Plus, ‘Lovely’ kept the kennel room all neat and tidy, great roommate actually.  You don’t see me moping around all day moaning and groaning because he’s gone though, do you.”

“What am I going to do without Linda though Rocky?  I loved her.”

“Lord help me, what did I do to end up with this sap.  MAN UP!”

Rocky’s owner sits down on a bench and starts to quietly weep as Rocky looks around worried they’ll be seen.

“What in the hell!  Are you crying!?!  Help!  Help!  Somebody take me to the pound!  Humane Society!  ANYTHING!  You have lost your mind.  There is a man code and I will turn you in.  I am a Rottweiler, a ROTTWEILER!  Shouldn’t you have gotten a poodle or a Yorkie with your sensibilities?  As a Rottweiler, I am not equipped to deal with too much sentiment.  Wrong breed dude, wrong breed.”

“Have a heart Rocky; I’m hurting here.”

“Heaven help me.”

Rocky sits down next to his owner and looks around to make sure no one is listening.

“Okay man, I’ll try, besides, if you cry too much longer I might have to turn in my sharp teeth to the Rottweiler Foundation for not using them on you.  Okay, look here poodle, I see all the ladies looking at you at the dog park.  Sure, most of them are looking at you because Rocky is so adorable, but some of them are actually looking at you because you’re you.  You’re a good guy.  You’re… What do they call that?  What do they call that?  Let me see, let me see,… SENSITIVE!  That’s it, yeah, you’re sensitive, and the ladies in your world, unlike my dog world; they go for that.  You’ll find another lady, take my word for it poodle.”

“You think so?”

“I know so.”

“Oh Rocky, I don’t know what I would do without you.”

“Hey, hey, hey, reel it in poodle, reel it in.  Rocky doesn’t do the droopy.  Rottweiler, remember, Rott-Weiler!  We don’t do droopy.  This little conversation is all my droopy for the entire year, maybe an entire lifetime.”

“I love you Rocky.”

“Oh my precious Rottweiler genes.  Dude, if you don’t man up and stand up and throw that gosh darn stick so Rocky can fetch it, I am going to take you out myself…  Rocky needs to chase a stick!  Rocky needs to chase a stick and get back to some basics so Rocky can forget the last fifteen minutes ever happened.  Throw the stick poodle, throw the stick!  Stand up, and throw ~ the ~ STICK!”

He stands up and throws the stick as Rocky runs and chases down the stick then returns to his owner and they start the walk back home.

“You know what Rocky?”

“What poodle?”

“I love you man.”

“I know poodle, I know.”

By

Anthonystjoseph

All works copyrighted  and protected by law